A Star For Every Word I've Ever Erased

But the next great adventure.

2007-07-23T05:31:02Z

This morning at approximately 2:50 AM, Cedric the Gnome and I finished the seventh and final installment of the epic tale of Harry Potter.
After reading the last page of the Epilogue, and staring at the blankness of the pages beyond, we turned to face each other, teary-eyed and rosy-cheeked. I smiled slightly and patted his red hat.
"It couldn't have gone on forever."
He lowered his eyes and nodded in sad agreement. A drunk person shouted briefly beyond the window. I suddenly became very aware of the Muggleness of the world, settling around me like heavy dust.
But when Cedric raised his glance to once again meet mine, there was a sparkle in his eye that told me this was not the end of magic in my life, that it would never, in fact, cease to pulse in my veins.

Gone

2007-07-03T01:33:23Z

Today Cedric and I were waiting at the Central Square T-stop to take the Red Line inbound to Park Street. The train sped viciously past the platform, a woman in the front window with her palm pressed against the glass in ominous warning. It refused to stop, and the rush of air in it's wake swept Cedric's red hat from his head and pulled it tumbling down the dark tunnel. He looked at me, eyes wide, afraid to chase after it. I patted his shiny, balding head and said, "It's an excuse to go hat shopping."

And it was STILL raining.

2007-05-20T14:29:53Z

Last night, Cedric the Gnome and I shared a giant chocolate cupcake with a gooey inch of frosting and multi-colored sprinkles. By the time it was finished, I had chocolate all over my fingers and Cedric had smudges on his nose and, somehow, also his tall red hat. We laughed heartily and drank our milk, but later slept turned away from each other, on opposite sides of the bed.

Plans

2007-05-08T05:22:41Z

I have a new gnome-friend, his name is Cedric. Tomorrow Cedric and I are going to dive into the Charles, swim to the bottom and pick the beautifully mutated sea-daisies that grow there. We are going to make a bouquet of them for the kitchen table as the current table-flowers, housewarming gifts from Christina and Julie, are tragically starting to die. After this we will go to the laundromat as we will need to climb into the washers and clean the scummy Charles water out of our clothes, hair and skin. I imagine it will be a lovely sight, watching Cedric's red hat swirl 'round and around.

First Entry In A Million Years OR Snowed In(!)

2006-12-21T01:26:41Z

I woke up this morning to 6 missed calls from my mom telling me that I was not allowed to drive myself to work, a) because I'm already a fairly ridiculous driver, especially when I haven't driven a car in a month and b) because it was blizzarding. She drove me to work, where I stayed for approximately an hour and a half before the mall declared a snow day. I've been at home since, reading Flesh and Blood by Michael Cunningham (wonderful and thoroughly depressing) and drinking hot COCO (with Bailey's instead of Molly's, however). Sad that I couldn't possibly think of a better beginning to break?
Miss my wife and concubines... oh, and boyfriend (a little bit).

PS. Snow's supposed to stop tomorrow around noon... possibly TWO snow days?!?! Holy white christmas, Batman!

FUCK Beer Pong

2006-09-04T01:34:16Z

Maree's Recently Learned Pearls of Wisdom:
1. Do not begin drinking before your beer pong team is up.
2. Do not get cocky when (for some reason) your beer pong team wins.
3. Do not continue supplementary drinking after your beer pong team has lost miserably and is going to be up for another round shortly.
4. Do not decide that it is a good idea to smoke a bowl while you are partaking in supplementary drinking and are waiting for your next turn to lose horribly.
5. Do not make two packets of Easy Mac.
6. Do not eat those two packets of Easy Mac.
7. Do not continue playing beer pong after almost everyone has left and the only remaining team consists of the two boys who have been playing since the age of eight.
8. Do not offer to play the last game of beer pong, especially when there are only two beers left and ESPECIALLY when there were ninety-six beers to begin with.
9. Do not make peppermint tea with milk.
10. Do not play roughly with the cat when you can't feel your hands.
11. Do not continue to lay in bed even though you feel as though you're on a merry-go-round.
12. Do not throw up in said bed because you are too blacked out to move.
13. Do not fail to drink water before you pass out for good after throwing up in multiple places.
14. Avoid all of the above: Just do not fucking play beer pong.

Best. Concert. EVER.

2006-07-17T07:21:35Z

I have not posted all summer (as some might have noticed), but for good reason: nothing very exciting and/or memorable has happened. At least nothing positive.
But tonight I got to see Brand New at the Ogden Theater in Denver. I screamed/sang myself hoarse. I had goosebumps. At times I couldn't tell the difference between sweat and tears.
The lead singer is brilliant: he seems shy and reserved, but his music is full of more passion and truth than some people will experience in a lifetime. I've been listening to both their albums for two and half years. Tonight I found different meanings and interpretations in songs that I've had memorized since I first heard them. The set consisted of every song I could have possibly wanted to hear and the new songs from their upcoming album make me want to go illegally download it right now. The light show they had was also brilliant and complimented the mood of everything perfectly. I HAVE to list the four song encore, even though no one reading this will understand:
1. a new song
2. Sic Transit Gloria (the first song I ever heard by them)
3. Seventy Times Seven (the BEST song when you're mad at your friends)
4. Play Crack the Sky (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

I can now scratch another band off the list of Bands I Have to See Before I Die (two down, Bright Eyes to go...).

The Apocalypse Didn't Happen

2006-06-07T06:57:04Z

Today (well, TECHNICALLY yesterday) was 6/6/06. More importantly, the release of AFI's new (and utterly brilliant) album Decemberunderground. I made a special trek with Alex to Best Buy, because the CD was only $10 there. I remembered I had a few bucks left on a gift card and after subtracting that from the price, guess what my total was? That's right: $6.66. So I was totally prepared for the end of the world.
The Omen also premiered and I was supposed to go see it, but due to not getting to the theater early enough, it sold out and I ended up seeing X-Men. *swoons* It was stunning. I laughed, I cried, I wished I had mutant powers to silence the restless douche bags in the front row. I want to write an essay on the ethical considerations the whole X-Men trilogy raises. In light of the speculation I've heard about the story being an allegory of the gay rights movement of today, I relate very closely with it.
Oh piff I'm tired. Bedtime.

L'Via (<---Matthew, qu'est que-ce?)

2006-05-25T16:19:09Z

Started reading Bridget Jones's Diary last night, which put me in the mood to write ridiculously funny things about my life. Realized life isn't really all that ridiculous and/or funny right now, more just ironic and boring.
Went to guy friend's 21st birthday party the other night, did too many shots of white tequila and walked through the Wendy's drive-through at 1:00am with Hillary-Dillary (who is visiting until Saturday!). She's actually spending most of the time with her friends in Denver though, which is disappointing. You'd think I'd know how to share by now, but I've never been very good at it.
Going to visit my eighth grade english teacher today, should a be a trip down I-hated-these-memories-when-they-were-happening lane. Perhaps afterward I'll go swimming with Alexter, since CO right now is getting rather warm. I hate how Mr. Golden Sun makes me miss East Coast people more than Mrs. Melancholy Rain.

Why I Will Never Watch TV Again: A Short Essay

2006-05-16T04:52:57Z

The season finale of Grey's Anatomy left my face soggy and heart wrenched. I am now eating peanut butter with a spoon and listening to sad music. To prevent this from happening in the future, I will officially stay very far away from TV programing of any sort... that is, until next September when the new season of Grey's airs. Oh the irony. At least then I'll have multiple shoulders to cry on, instead of just a large fuzzy blanket with penguins on it.

It's been years...

2006-05-13T00:44:36Z

Today was the first day it felt like summer, the first day I turned on the air conditioning and cursed my car's leather seats. I spent most of the day being lethargic with Amanda and Alex, we sat at Starbucks for an hour discussing this and that. They smoked and I pretended not to be agitated by the random bits of ash that found their way onto my arms. I've missed Amanda so much I don't have the heart to tell her not to smoke in my car, so we drove fast with the windows down and the music blasting over wind heated like it had just been released from a huge oven. My new favorite song is "My Doorbell" by the White Stripes, a song Amanda put on and, looking at me mischievously through those too-bright baby blues, said, "This reminds me of you." It's been stuck in everyone's head all day, even the friends of ours who whined when we played it in the first place, singing along obnoxiously: "I'm thinkin' 'bout my doorbell, when ya gonna ring it, oh when ya gonna ring it?"
Last night was great, had sushi with a large group of people, including Mr. Matthew, who insisted on many pictures and short videos, and Jenna-Benna, who I had not seen in ages and who stunned me with her brilliance all over again. I tried eel for the first time, it was crunchy and quite fishy-tasting, but overall not bad. The ever-trendy restaurant Hapa was packed with drunk college students and their parents, as Colorado University's graduation was this morning. Fun.
Right now it's that point in the day right before sunset when the golden light finds such perfect ways to dapple through the leaves of my front-yard tree and onto my arms. I feel like I'm in a Vermeer painting, he captured light better than any camera I've ever seen. There will be a nice walk with my dog in a bit, when I'm not feeling so dreamy and content.

Silly Game

2006-04-26T17:05:46Z

I got this game in a forward and thought it looked fun...
Instructions: Go to your music player of choice and put it on shuffle. Say the following questions aloud, and press play. Use the song titles that come up to answer each question. The key to this game is that you don't cheat.

How does the world see me?
Manic Monday-Reliant K (Cover from Punk Goes 80s)

Will I have a happy life?
Purple Haze-Jimi Hendrix ("Excuse me while I kiss the sky"!!!!!!!!)

What do people really think of me?
Resolution-Motion City Soundtrack ("I lack the universe" hehe...)

Do people secretly lust after me?
What I Got (Reprise)-Sublime (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

How can I make myself happy?
Drunkship of Lanterns-The Mars Volta (???? Has the word drunk in it?...)

What should I do with my life?
Cabron-Red Hot Chili Peppers (This equals be happy and dance!)

What is some good advice for me?
Recycled Air-The Postal Service

What song will play at my funeral?
We Both Go Down Together-The Decemberists (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

What type of men/women do I like?
Morning Song-Jewel (Big, collective "Awwwwwww!" please)

What is my day going to be like?
Treefingers-Radiohead (I did have an urge to climb trees today...)

Why am I here?
Myxomatosis (Judge, Jury and Executioner)-Radiohead (Kind of disconcerting :(

What will people remember me for?
Pink Bullets-The Shins ("Tied to a brick, sweet as a song, the years have been short but the days were long")

What song will I get stuck in my head tomorrow?
Wake Up-Coheed and Cambria (One of the best romantic songs EVER, totally pertains to my life right now: "I'm gonna ride this plane out of your life again, I wish that I could stay...")

Are there people outside waiting to take me away?
Where've You Been Hiding?-Architecture in Helsinki (!!!!!!!!!!!!)

What will this year be all about?
Where Is My Mind?-Pixies (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

I'll be honest, I cheated a bit ;)... But they still came up out of 2,624 songs.

Lalalalala

2006-04-13T17:22:43Z

I found out last night that my photographs are going to be on the front and back covers of Gauge, the on campus magazine I work for!!! YAY, now I don't feel like my recently declared photo minor will go to waste...
I also got to see Spamelot last night (for free!) because one of my fellow Writer's Blockers had extra tickets (!)... it was HILARIOUS and sparkly!
Right now God is trying to tell me to go do homework by occupying all of my other friends >_<. I think I shall go for a walk since it stopped raining...

britesunreyes @ 2006-03-23T12:07:00

2006-03-23T17:16:39Z

Today in weather class, I learned the truth about lightning... it's actually positive electric charge coming UP from the ground to meet with negative electric charge that builds up at the bottom of cumulonimbus (thunderstorm) clouds. And usually, when someone gets "struck", they aren't in the path of the main bolt, they're caught by one of the "streamers" that converge with the main spark. It looks like lightning is coming from the clouds because of they way the electricity lights up when the positive and negative charges converge. I just thought it had interesting implications about people who believe that (other) people can be "struck down" by God from heaven in the form of lightning. In reality, it's more like the earth is striking up at us from below. Crazy.

Tra-la la la and Other Such British Noises...

2006-03-11T01:06:26Z

Last night Hillary Dillary Dock and I went to see "Mrs. Henderson Presents" and it was absolutely the most hilarious and touching thing I've watched in a long time... We were the only 2 in the theater, so there was lots of loud giggling and exclaiming... I demand that everyone who reads this be cursed in the worst possible way until they too partake in the enjoyment of this fabulous film.
In other news, I returned to Boston today from the lovely Fairport NY. Our six hour drive was made bearable by music appreciation time: Disney songs, Rent, Wicked and Aida soundtracks, the Beatles and Coldplay... Unfortunately, it was made longer by the inability of Hillary and I to navigate the absurdity that is the MassPike as it goes through Boston. It's a wonder that I am still alive and was not strangled...
At present, I am sitting in Aunt Lucille's house in Brookline, NOT doing the homework that I've abstained from doing all week. Ah. Further relaxing in a food coma from delicious Mexican and cheesecake...

Oh Oscar, You Old Devil You...

2006-03-06T18:17:43Z

Last night was the first time I didn't watch the Oscars at my mom's annual Oscar party, drinking red wine and listening to her and friends make fun of everyone's outfits... :[. Hillary, Lisa and I ate Brie cheese and said lots of politically incorrect things. Phillip Seymour Hoffman is from their town (Fairport, NY) and went to their high school, so we all screamed when he won (well, Lisa and I screamed, Hillary yelled at us for potentially waking up her parents). The best acceptance speeches (in our most humble opinions) were: George Clooney (Best Supporting Actor-Syriana); crazy happy French guy who brought stuffed penguins onstage and advocated for the happiness of Antarctica in adorable, broken English (Best Documentary-March of the Penguins); overjoyed African guy who cried and ordered the cameras to be turned on his lead actors and said "Even though we're foreign language films, our stories are the same as yours." (Best Foreign Language Film-Tsotsi); Ang Lee, the cutest Taiwanese man in the WORLD, who said "Love is what makes us similar" (Best Director-Brokeback Mountain). Another heart-stopping quote (we wrote IT down, but not WHO said it), was: "Art is not a mirror to hold up to society, but a hammer to shape it." Overall, LURV-LY evening...
PS. Met one of my new favorite gay men yesterday... his name is James and he looks like Orlando Bloom and spit coffee all over me (by accident :) and I lurv lurv lurv him!

pitter patter goes my heart

2006-03-02T21:52:19Z

My attempt at happy poetry:

singy-songy sonnets
slap
sense into
stupidity.
But stupidity
sounds so good.

We don't (won't?) touch the elephant in the room with a ten foot pole, so it crouches in the corner and exhales shrilly every time you ask me what's wrong.
I don't know how to be happy believably, still
I don't know how to be out-rightly angry, yet
I don't do bitterness well, and
I don't like acting like a child.

But I also don't know what to say, because
of course not--
no--
I'm not okay.

I recently renamed my hard drive.

2006-03-01T15:13:22Z

Today is fucking freezing, but the sun is shining brightly... which seems to be the story of my life ;).
Even though it's usually against every moral fiber of my being to post more than one LJ entry in 24 hours, I feel that due to extenuating circumstances, an apology is in order.
For the severe emo/angsty-ness of last night (very early morning?)'s post, I would like to apologize. Clarification: Not necessarily apologizing for the severe angst itself (because I feel it can often be cathartic) just for the tragic way I decided to portray it...? Maybe? I can't really decide what I should be apologizing for, but for some reason I feel like I should be. So, um, take it to mean whatever you will... Perhaps my slaughter of the otherwise gorgeous French language?...
POSITIVE NOTE (because they always exist): Recent sentiments and experiences have given me SUPERB material for my personal, non-fiction essay I must write for Creative Writing next semester. Working title: 12 Steps to Not Being in Love With Your Best Friend.
Woo-hoo!
Must stop dicking around and do HW.
Wish my eyelids weren't so puffy (direct adverse effect of angst... consider yourself warned).

CHICKEN BUTT!

"Finding a replacement with a heart sedated..."

2006-03-01T05:20:55Z

IIIVX.
tears are like tea
your eyes are like spiderwebs
i can’t write the rest

sometimes my own syntax is insufficient, so...

“I am a writer, a writer of fictions.
I am the heart that you call home.
And I’ve written pages upon pages,
trying to rid you from my bones.”

“I’ve never been so alone
And I’ve, I’ve never been so alive.”

Si j’avais voulu tomber dans amoreaux avec vous, je ne aurais jamais venu votre meilleur amie. J’espere que quelque jour, vous pouvez me pardonner. Merci pour me dire quoi j’avais besoin d’entendre.
Je t’aime toujours.

The Good, the Bad and the British

2006-02-28T04:15:14Z

Simple Pleasures in Life That Make Me Smile:
1. Cinnamon Dolce Lattes
2. Correct change
3. E-mails from long lost English teachers
4. Mittens
5. Peach flavored "O" water
6. The relieved, stretchy feeling after yoga class
7. Naps
8. Wearing someone else's shoes
9. Curly french fries
10. Honesty

On another note...
I hate inconclusiveness.
I hate being in limbo.
I hate feeling like there's nothing I can do to remedy it.
I hate wondering.
I hate hating things.

"And all the roads we have to walk are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I would like to say to you
But I don't know how."

DEATH

2006-02-23T14:45:00Z

I feel like death. Like death on toast. My tonsils are so swollen I can feel them pulsing in the back of my throat. Well, not pulsing EXACTLY, but I can still feel them and that's weird enough. I'm skipping Weather class and want to go back to sleep, but I have an appointment with Health and Wellness at ten thirty. I wish this were Hogwarts because then they could just make my tonsils disappear. Stupid worthless Muggles...

A Three Day Weekend Retrospective OR Sniffles Suck

2006-02-21T04:21:24Z

Had our first wine and cheese party of the semester (bout damn time) Friday night after seeing Capote (fabulously depressing movie-- deserves many Oscars). I had almost an entire bottle of French wine to myself and still haven't decided if it was a good idea or bad idea. Woke up with a boy in my bed... Honestly not how it sounds, there was only minor making out. His name is Chance (though in my infinite articulation, I keep calling him Chaz and/or Chase). Don't really know where that's going to go, think he's a sweetheart, but don't really know him too well (yet). We're getting tea and crumpets together tomorrow and hopefully there will be conversing on the subject of where exactly we're going to stand. I think casual hanging out, certainly nothing greater than dating, would be nice. The irony of this is, he's from... drum roll... Iowa. I come all the way out to the East Coast to hook up with a fellow Midwesterner *shakes head*.
Spent the rest of the weekend in Groton, Connecticut with Christina and Melissa. We drank too much rum and decided that Christina and I are twins and Melissa is our little sister. Proceeded to call each other "Sis" for the rest of the evening, which wasn't very long as Melissa and I were passed out by 12:30 (in all fairness, I'd only gotten about 3 hours of sleep the night before). The next day brought Christina's raging fever and too much fast food (Taco Bell, Dunkin Donuts, Quiznos and Domino's). The day after that... um, today... a three hour bus ride brought us to home sweet Boston again. I've been alternating between homework, mooching food off of other people and watching Robin Williams Live on Broadway.
Wish my head wasn't so stuffy and that I understood magical realism.

This is why I don't watch TV

2006-02-09T04:23:25Z

Nick (absolutely adorable faux-hawked gay man) got voted off Project Runway and Santino didn't even though he's a lying, immature, basset hound-eyed douche bag who also happens to look like a child rapist. Gr.
Hip-hop class was a BLAST, I didn't have to fake my way through the choreography and may even make a concerted effort to remember it. I've had the songs Goldigger and Drop it Like it's Hot rotating around in my head for the past few days and am convinced that it's my subconscious telling me that I need to go clubbing again. I miss Tracks and Sir Matthew :(.
Nighty night.

At Your Very DEMANDING Requests

2006-02-07T18:26:05Z

Haven't updated in ages due to my New Year's resolution that this semester I was going to spend less time dicking around in the Internet and more time reading books/doing hw (in that order). So far I've only read Middlesex (by Jeffrey Eugenides) which CHANGED MY LIFE. Seriously, one of the best books I've ever read. Some choice quotations:
"Maybe the best proof that the language is patriarchal is that it oversimplifies feeling. I'd like to have at my disposal complicated hybrid emotions, Germanic train-car constructions like, say, 'the happiness that attends disaster.' Or: 'the disappointment of sleeping with one's fantasy.'"
"Beauty is always freakish."
"I, even now, persist in believing that these black marks on white paper bear the greatest significance, that if I keep writing I might be able to catch the rainbow of consciousness in a jar."
Unfortunately, if I share the line that gave me goosebumps and brought tears to my eyes AND made me laugh (talk about hybrid emotions) I would ruin one of the most touching moments of the story. The moral: GO READ THIS BOOK. MAINTENANT. DEPECHEZ-VOUS! My current reading projects (excluding the massive amount for school) include 100 Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez (which I started at the beginning of last semester and recently tried to pick up where I left off and was VERY confused. So I'm going to need to start that one over); The Beauty of the Husband by Anne Carson (recommended and lent to me by the ever-lovely Christie Towers); and Brokeback Mountain by Annie Proulx (which I haven't technically started but plan on starting today at some point during my 7 1/2 hour shift).
To elaborate on the less dorky and boring aspects of my life, I went to NH avec Kate for a romantic weekend getaway and had clam chowder for the first time EVER. As all my friends from the West are currently scratching their heads and wondering what the significance is, let me explain that it is, according to New Englanders/East Coasters in general, a TRAVESTY not to have eaten clam chowder by the age of two let alone eighteen. I was even introduced as "The poor child that's never had clam chowda". So Kate, Jesse and I went to Maine to frolic on York Beach (I took lots of happy pictures) and eat chowder. It was a beautiful day. That evening we wandered around Portsmouth (DIDN'T go to the Enchanted Forest) and ended up at a party where we watched Drunk Russian Boy (who'd been hitting on me half the night) make out with Trashed Blond Girl for 3 HOURS. In the infinitely wise words of me: "Ewwwwww, HETEROS, EWWWWWW!!!!" On Kate and I's train ride home through the New England countryside, I wrote lots of cracked out haikus *see my MySpace blog for complete texts*. In summary, the weekend was superbly entertaining and enlightening.
At the moment, I must refrain from further self-indulgent ramblings and go finish some homework before the impending doom of work (3-10:30pm shift is soooo bitch ass).
Mais je vous aime. Beaucoup beaucoup beaucoup.

FUCK Friday the 13th

2006-01-14T22:36:36Z

Next year on Friday the 13th, I'm going with Dennis's plan of sitting and doing NOTHING. Nothing at all, not even anything involving electronic devices. I would like to make a public apology to Monsieur Matthew: Je suis tres desolee pour (ditching you) et le sushi. Hier soir etais horrible.
Here are some of the disastrous things my night involved: sketchy and steep dirt roads, mountainous wilderness, IDIOTIC drunk boys, an over dramatic drunk girl, cut-short connections, anger management issues and driving home (refer back to the sketchy and steep dirt roads) at 6 am to sleep for a few hours before waking up with a Hang Over of Death and Destruction.
For a full account of the treacheries of the evening, please call or e-mail me personally as my head is pounding too hard right now to relay the story in it's full glory.